Buaslbutterfly’s Blog

{April 25, 2011}   Update on PT contact

I finally called the PT in Harrisburg. They are accepting new patients, but with my work schedule and breastfeeding son, I am not sure I’ll be able to make this work. I am still trying to see if its an option. The biggest thing was making the phone call. It seems like such an easy step, but in some ways its the hardest. It is me getting back on the horse and being willing to try something new. It is opening myself again to another individual about my condition. It is having someone new put their hands in area that isn’t comfortable. It is opening that trust door.

Well a lot to think about.


{April 21, 2011}   April 2011

Right now I’m in a bit of a rutt. My husband doesn’t seem to understand my hesitancy in changing physcial therapists. If only he understood that I’ve heard of many people with my condition that go to different clinics for many years until they find the right person. I found someone in Doylestown whom I found sucess with and whom I trust. Yes, this individual, gave the name of a person closer, but I am not certain that this is the right thing. I guess I just need to get over that emotional hump.

I understand my husband’s frustration. He spent 4 1/2 years with no sex in a marriage. We barely started having sucess and then I got pregnant and nothing for about 12 months and then nothing again because I have gone back to where I started. I am suppose to have a papsmear after the whole pregnancy, but because of the state of things, I haven’t actively seeked a gyn in the area I live. I know I’m on a downward spiral emotionally and that I just need to get back on the saddle so to speak. I just am frustrated.

My husband admitted to me for the first time, that prior to our initial sucess last December, he had thought that we were going to never be able to have sex. This was from all the reading and research he had done online. Then after sucess and seeing that the physical therapy was a sucess, that is why he is on me. I’m glad that I have him there because I need that push. Right now I’m not pushing myself. I’m getting the phone right now because I’m going to make this phone call.

I just needed to blog to deal with my fears and feelings. I’m hoping that I can do an interview before deciding that she is the right person for me.

et cetera