Buaslbutterfly’s Blog

{February 14, 2009}   Valentine’s Day and Vaginismus

I heard someone the other day telling another person that the only thing you can do to satisfy your man for all he has done is sex.  According to them, that if this individual didn’t put out, the man would not repeat said actions.   hmm. 

   I have been married for 3 1/2 years.  I haven’t exactly put out for my man because I can’t and my husband still takes me out and works hard to surprise me and do small things for me.  So I think that my whole situation has helped me to see that this isn’t what men look for.  If a man takes you out, make them feel special by getting ready for them.  Put the extra smile and effort to show that you truely love what they did. Most importantly be yourself. 

If you have Vaginismus, realize sex isn’t the end all.  It is possible to find romance even beyond the Vaginismus.  I use to think I was soo special that my man stayed with me and was soo understanding.  After joining an online group, I have come to realize that a man whose truely worth being with, will be understanding and supportive.

So enjoy your Valentine’s Day with family and loved ones.  My goal is to not let my Vaginismus get my mood down. That is hard. It is harder for me, because even though it doesn’t outwardly show from my husband. I, myself, want to experience and share what should come natural, but hasn’t.  Someday it will happen.  For now I will enjooy what I have and share.

Knowing that other men are like that, doesn’t still change that I feel so lucky and fortunate to have the love of my life.


et cetera